On this journey into financial well-being, I've recognized a few very silly yet dangerous ideas I had regarding money:

- I was treating credit available balances as checking accounts "Hey, I have 2000 in available balance, therefore I have 2000 dollars" ...
I wasn't aware of this but let's say I had to do an oil change for $20, looked into my checking, no money. Oh, Look! I have money on this credit card, charge and forget about it. Money on my credit cards is not my money. I shouldn't be using it as a secondary checking account. Silly ugh?

- I am in the red each month but I don't like to hear "you can not afford cable, or a premium plan for your cell" for days I thought people were crazy, "of course I can afford it, cable is "just" $40 and the premium cell plan is "just" $20 extra. What I didn't think is, where are those $60 coming from? I do not have them. So, it is true, I can not afford those things. Plain and simple.

I look back and I am not sure what I was thinking, denial perhaps?

A member here invited me to feel empowered by cutting back instead of defeated or depressed. I like that option and I chose it for me.

So now I thrive to use only money that is mine (aka my salary) and I am getting ready to do those adjustments, one at a time and with the ever so important sense of self-care and self-compassion.
When I am ready to let go and not any sooner.

First one on the list is cable.

I decided that before I make the call to cut it:
I will borrow some DVDs from the library
I will buy my son a few DVD's and a few for me (around $60 for initial collection)
I will wait for those DVD to arrive
I will assign $5/month to buy DVDs or go to the movies.

These are concessions I feel I can do although it means I will still be in the red for a couple of months.
It will be ok.

I have made a few mistakes.

I forgot one bill, I know a late fee is coming. Breathe, it happens. It is ok.

I forgot my cell phone charger today, breathe, turn it off, save for the commute. It is ok.

Tonight I will take care of that bill, late fee included, readjust budget a litle.

Tonight I will put my cell charger in my purse. It is ok.

I will make mistakes. but I can start anew any time I want. I don't have to be error free next week or next month. I start anew right now. Self judment and guilt are not welcome here, they have no power because they are not useful to me.

Self patience and understanding takes me far. I move forward.

This are the desires I am manifesting:

* I am free of unsecured debt.
Debt disolves and the credit cards become a plastic fund for real emergencies, they become a source of piece of mind, not a burden.

* I eat nutritious, delicious meals that I effortlessly prepare for myself and my family.
I prepared pasta for my son and I. Read a book about bulk cooking, I am figuring this out.

* I am secured for my retirement.

* My home is neat and clean, It is easy to find anything I need, it is easy to keep it clean. I enjoy being in my home.

I have a 3/2 plus a pc area, and laundry area.

My living room is clean and neat
My Dining room is clean and neat
My Bathroom 1 is neat and clean
My Bedroom 3 is clean and neat
PC area is clean and neat
My Laundry area is clean and neat


Becoming clean and neat
Bedroom 1
Bedroom 2
Bathroom 2
Kitchen (I had forgotten this one!)
Garage

I have removed a lot of objects from my house, donating, trashing. For every 4 drawers, 3 remain empty, waiting for a purpose. I feel light and powerful. It is so easy to breathe!

I go into the rooms that have been decluttered and cleaned, they are a sanctuary I just seat, relax, be. My whole house, my home becomes a sanctuary. I detach from so much stuff, I move forward.

This is so nice.

This are the desires I am manifesting:

* I am free of unsecured debt.
I had to use credit this pay period because I came on short, but I am deducing those charges from the checking account, so that when I deposit my salary I'll have the money to pay back for those new charges. - like it never happened -

* I eat nutritious, delicious meals that I effortlessly prepare for myself and my family.
I brought lunch today, chicken and lentils and fruit.

* I am secured for my retirement.

* My home is neat and clean, It is easy to find anything I need, it is easy to keep it clean. I enjoy being in my home.

I have a 3/2 plus a pc area, and laundry area.

My living room is clean and neat
My Dining room is clean and neat
Bedroom 3 is clean and neat
PC area is clean and neat

Becoming clean and neat
Bedroom 1
Bedroom 2
Bathroom 1
Bathroom 2
Laundry area
Garage

This is what I am manifesting for myself. I am writing my goals in present time:

* I am free of unsecured debt.
* I eat nutritious, delicious meals that I effortlessly prepare for myself and my family.
* I am secured for my retirement.
* My home is neat and clean, It is easy to find anything I need, it is easy to keep it clean. I enjoy being in my home.